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Problems of the children and the youth

meeting them. In general, all the problems of the youth are linked with the present rather than with the past or future.

Last week, I a private rehabilitation clinic outside Edinburgh, Leo Edwards, a 16-year-old schoolboy, was going through severe withdrawal symptoms. His body often shook violently and uncontrollably, and at mealtimes he regularly threw cups and plates around the dinner room. The boy's addiction had nothing to do with alcohol, drugs, gambling or food. His problem was "Net obsession" - an over-dependency on the Internet.

An international group of psychologists has recently suggested that anyone who surfs the Internet for long periods is clinically ill and needs medical treatment. According to their report, Internet addicts should be treated in the same way as alcoholics, drug addicts, compulsive gamblers and people with eating disorders.

Leo Edwards is not an isolated case. Russell Hopkins, aged 15, from Gateshead in north-east England, is a typical online addict. Every day after school, and after dinner until 3 or 4 in the morning, he will be found in his room surfing the Net or playing computer games. By the end of the day he will have spent more than six hours online. Understandably, his parents are extremely worried. Not only has his school work suffered, but Russell's addiction has also destroyed his social life and his spare time interests. For instance, he has just dropped out of his school's basketball team in order to spend more time at his computer. Instead of spending next weekend having a good time out with friends, he will be spending it indoors surfing the Internet. Russell has recently joined at Internet online support group. It may seem ironic that many of the support groups for Internet addicts are online but at least Russell has sought help. Not everyone does. Dr. Ann Hoffman, who runs an online support group, says, "People do not realize that being online for more than 4 hours a day amounts to addiction and they have a serous problem. I predict that the number of people who join online support groups will have risen dramatically within 3 years.


e) A generation gap


Youth is the time when a person is trying to find his place in the world. And during this search he or she comes across different problems which are as important as those of the adults. The youth of the 21st century face almost the same problems which were acute to their parents when they were young.

One of them is a generation gap. Every generation is unique in its experience. It has its own ideals and system of values concerning every aspect of human life. Adults always complain that the young are not what they were. These words are repeated from generation to generation. Undoubtedly it is correct. In fact today the young are better educated. They grow up more quickly. They derive joy from more freedom. At present the young do not blindly accept the ideals of their parents. For them everything that the adults bear in mind is past history. And this is inevitable; because different generations take different directions.

Moreover, the young look forward and the old people look backward. The young people know what they want. They prefer to make their own mistakes rather than to listen to the warnings of the adults. The young people want to live their own life. They want to overcome their own difficulties without turning back. Unfortunately, the life of the young is frequently determined by the adults. The adults start the war but the young die in it. The young and the adults have different points of view concerning everything. And it generates the conflict of the generations. In the 19th century Ivan Turgenev in his novel "Fathers and Sons" perfectly illustrated the eternal problem of fathers and children's misunderstanding. Many young people have other interests. For some of them getting knowledge is of primary importance. They are fond of reading serious books, listening to serious music. They go to the conservatories and theatres. They are engaged in Hi- Tech through the Internet.


f) The problem of love and friendship. Suicide in the young

family problem children

The problem of love is very important for the young people. Romanticism and idealism very often accompany the love of the young. Their belief in eternal love can end dramatically. Today nobody doubts about the depth of their passion. It is regrettable, but the young are not always ready to have stable relations.

Suicide among the teenagers male population has reached crisis point with 72% increase in reported cases over 20 years, the UK survey says. What are the reasons of this suicide? The first reason is an unhappy love. Here are some teenagers' letters with the answers of psychologists which were published in the youth magazines such as "Just seventeen", "Jackie", MIZZ".

Now we hate each other.

"I am 16 years old and have been going out with my boyfriend for 2 years, and I thought I really loved him. Then one day we had sex and it was the biggest mistake of our lives. We now both hate each other and can not look each other in the eye. We have not spoken for nearly a month and I feel really dirty, and I know all his friends are calling me a slag because he told them what happened. Now everyone thinks I am easy. What can I do?"

Answer: I hate to say it but this boy deserves a bit of a sharp slap. Doesn't he realize that he played quite a major part in this whole messy venture? So sex did not work out and that is no one's fault. The first time isn't always brilliant despite what some films show, so do not judge this unfortunate experience as the norm. You have nothing to feel guilty or bad about as you haven't done anything wrong. On the other hand, he should be ashamed of his behavior. People's reactions to his comments will blow over and they will see him for the idiot he really is. Till then, keep your head up. After all, you have done nothing wrong at all.

No sex without love.

"I am a virgin and I can not decide whether I should have sex for the first time with someone. I do not know - for the sake of experience. It is just that when someone special comes along and we have sex it will be very special and good because I will know what I am doing. I do not want my first time to be a disaster."

Answer: Your letter really worries me. You seem to think of sex as some sort of game whereby you can practice with anyone in order to make it perfect. Sex is only perfect when you do it with someone you care about and trust. I doubt very much that practicing with just anyone will prepare you for this moment. In any case, when the time comes to have sex with someone you are close to, he won't expect you to be an expert, because it is not a competition. Believe me, sex without love is like swimming without water. Do yourself a favor - wait until you feel ready and sure before you do anything rash.

Scared of kissing.

"People at school make fun of me because I have never snogged a boy. I have had several chances, but every time it happens I end up chickening out. People think I am weird and I am beginning to worry there must be something wrong with me.”

Answer: Kissing with someone should be seen as some sort of test to pass, and there is nothing wrong with wanting to wait until you find a boy you feel confident with. Stop worrying that there is anything wrong with you and try to accept that you have every right to take things at your own place. Take it from me – kissing is nothing to be afraid of!

Dumped for a new boyfriend

“ I am feeling really angry at the moment and I do not know what to do. Ever since I was about three I have been friends with this girl, we have been through everything together. And now she has dumped me for a new boyfriend. I am really sick of it, she totally ignored all this week and has gone off with her boyfriend. I do have other friends, but I am just so upset she has just thrown away our friendship after all these years. I do not know what to do about it now. What do you suggest?"

Answer: Try talking to your friend, perhaps she is so caught up with her new boyfriend that she really does not realize she's excluding you. Unfortunately, if your friend purposely chose to dump you for her new boyfriend then there is nothing you can do but review your friendship. Ask yourself - is your friendship real? And remember, friendships change with time. Often the best friends we have from childhood grow up and away from us but it is natural and normal. Other best friends will take this place.

I hate not having a boyfriend.

I'm having a problem at school. My best friends all have boyfriends and they see them all the time. They go out every Saturday with them, and even though they ask me along, I feel like a leftover. Sometimes at break their boyfriends will come over and they'll all ignore me completely. I wish I had a boyfriend -1 really hate not having one. I know this situation would be so much better if I was like my friends.

Answer: When you say that your situation would be better if you had a boyfriend I believe that you want a boyfriend for the wrong reasons. There are plenty of people who are single and yet have friends who are not. Having a boyfriend does not make you more of a person, only you can be that. Your friends are being pretty silly if they cannot see how important it is to keep their relationships going. Friends can last a lifetime, but boyfriends come and go. Try explaining to your friends how out of place you are feeling. After all, they know they need you as much as you need them.

Shy and spotty.

I am a 15-year-old girl and I have a very serious problem. At my age I should have had a boyfriend by now, but I have not. I feel no one is attracted to me. I do not know if it is because I am very shy around boys, but I think it is to do with how I look. I am quite spotty and quiet. I wish I could have plastic surgery, but I cannot afford it. Please, could you help me?

Answer: A recent survey showed that boys prefer personality and a sense of humor above looks when it came to picking a girlfriend. I am sure if you asked girls they would say the same thing. Most people are shy in certain situations, and no one will think any less of you for being this way. And if a person has spots, so what? You do not need plastic surgery - you need a serious dose of self-confidence. In time your spots will go. Remember, it is not what you look like; it is who you are that matters.

Hanging has replaced self-poisoning from car exhaust fumes and taking an overdose as the most common suicide method among 15- to 19-year-old men. The number of male suicide in this age group rose from 55 per million of the population in 1970 to 100 per million of the population at the turn of the century. Statistics underestimates the true extent of the problem because coroners prefer to classify many suicidal deaths as "accidental". It is always a mistake to look for one single cause but it is probably a crisis of confidence among the young people.

A crisis of confidence could arise for a variety of reasons including psychiatric disorders, disturbed family or partner relationships, unemployment and involvement in crime, leading to contact with the judicial system. A culture of drugs, alcohol delinquency is blamed for teenagers turning to suicide when their grip on life spirals out of control. Yet another reason is genetic variation and inability to regulate one’ mood and anxiety levels. Suicide rate among girls in the 15-19-year-old age group has decreased slightly. Suicide rates are the highest in Finland and Hungary, and low in Italy and Spain. UK levels are about the European average.

To choose a good friend is a very important problem. It is a well-known proverb “ A friend in need is a friend indeed". That is why everyone tries to make friends with cheerful and true persons who can understand you and with whom it is simple and interesting to speak.

g) Family problems


Young people have problems with their parents. What are they? They are concerned with education, money, employment, hobby, spending their free time, communication and the like. And of course, one of the most urgent problems is the accommodation problem. Few young people in country have their own apartments. In the they share the apartments with their parents even after getting married. It is a problem to get a good education and a very difficult problem of choosing

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